Strangers in the Night

Alright so for those of you who don't know I am a very paranoid person. This is not a joke people, it is totally out of control. Let me send you on a journey of my mind so when I tell you the story that goes along with this blog you will be able to better understand and feel sympathy for me. OK so the place where I currently reside (aka- chief and mommies house) does not have one of those fancy garage entries into the house. This means that when I return from a night out on the town (watching 30 rock at Daniel's house) I walk my tired butt out of the garage, up the stairs, unlock the front door, and finally go inside. Not a big deal right? NO!! It is a huge deal! I am sure at one point you momma told you that the Holy Ghost goes to bed at midnight (which I find highly irresponsible of him sinners need help too) which is totally true. I am not worried about who's lights are out at midnight, I am more concerned who's lights are on. Mainly Rapists and Murders! My senses are heightened like a cheetah at night, unfortunately I doubt there is anything to make me as fast as a cheetah, I'm a Mangum which means I go from 0-5 never. So while a normal person would get out of the car and casually walk to the door, I sprint as fast as I can taking three steps at a time! I open the door and once I'm in a immediately lock the door. I make sure that I never come home at the same time, so that the rapist waiting int he dark will not have a scheduled attack! I am also a huge fan of saying things that will make the rapist not interested in my bod. As I run I'll yell "It's that time of the month for me right now! I am no use to you!" I am hoping that this will continue to be a clever successful decoy... it has worked so far.

So now that you get a small glimpse into my paranoid state of mind I will tell my tale. So back in January a crazy drunk driver hit my car on the freeway and nearly totaled it. It spent a month and a half at the body shop getting repaired and when I got it back it was perfect... or so I thought. So last Saturday I realize I have a flat tire. I drove it straight to my neighborhood Big O' Tires to get it repaired and much to my dismay it is a blow out and I can't simply repair it. Then the man informs me that because of my choice in buying a safe all wheel drive car I must replace all four tires and they have to be special ordered in. I find no problem with this so I drive my car over to my mechanics to wait for the tires. While it was there I figured to save from further disaster that I might as well have him change the oil and check out under the hood and such. Here is where I get suspicious. So while my mechanic is snooping around all of these wires keep hitting him in the face! So turns out that the body shop put my car back wrong and what they did could have caused my engine to catch freaking fire! See why I am so paranoid! Those body shop boys wanted me blown up! I mean honestly us ladies already have to worry about stalkers in the night, now we can add crazy mechanics with they're butts hanging out to the list!